EASE DE TENSHUN!!!!

[watch de ride]

The doctor said, "Joe, the good news is I can cure your headaches. The
>>> bad
>>> news is that it will require castration. You have a very rare condition,

>>> which causes your testicles to press on your spine and the pressure
>>> creates one hell of a headache. The only way to relieve the pressure is
>>> to remove the testicles."
>>>
>>> Joe was shocked and depressed. He wondered if he had anything to live
>>> for. He had no choice but to go under the knife. When he left the
>>> hospital, he was without a headache for the first time in 20 years, but
>>> he felt like he was missing an important part of himself.
>>>
>>> As he walked down the street, he realized that he felt like a different
>>> person. He could make a new beginning and live a new life. He saw a
>>> men's clothing store and thought, "That's what I need... a new suit."
>>>
>>> He entered the shop and told the salesman, "I'd like a new suit." The
>>> elderly tailor eyed him briefly and said, "Let's see... size 44 long."
>>> Joe laughed, "That's right, how you knew?" "Been in the business 60
> >> years!" the tailor said. Joe tried on the suit and it fit perfectly. As
>>> Joe admired himself in the mirror, the salesman asked, "How about a new
>>> shirt?" Joe thought for a moment and then said, "Sure."
>>>
>>> The salesman eyed Joe and said, "Let's see, 34 sleeves and 16-1/2 neck."

>>> Joe was surprised, "That's right, how you knew?"
>>>
>>> "Been in the business 60 years." Joe tried on the shirt and it fit
>>> perfectly. Joe walked comfortably around the shop and the salesman
>>> asked, "How about some new underwear?" Joe thought for a moment and
> >> said, "Sure."
>>>
>>> The salesman said, "Let's see... size 36." Joe laughed, "Ah ha! I got
>>> you that time, I've worn a size 34 since I was 18 years old. " The
>>> salesman shook his head, "You can't wear a size 34. A size 34 would
>>> press your testicles up against the base of your spine and give you one
>>> hell of a headache."
>>>
>>> New suit - $400
>>> New shirt - $36
>>> New underwear - $6
>>> Second Opinion - PRICELESS

[grimm01]

Lawd have mercy!

[palos]

LOL....good one dey sah.  

A nex one...............

De warden of de madhouse in St Anns retirin and as a retirement "gift" to show how magnaminous he is (he mus be related to Manning) he declare he go release a deserving inmate.

He tell de guards find me 3 men who bright enough to answer a simple skill testing question.

De guards come back wit 3 fellas and dey standin up in front de Warden.

Warden say..."As I am leaving, I am going to let one of you deserving inmates go back to society.  My trusted guards have deemed you the pick of the bunch.  All you need to do is answer a simple skill testing question.  The first one who get's it right is released with my blessings"

He ask de first madman..."How much is 9 mutiply by 7?"

De 1st madman watch him and bawl without hesitation...."17!!!!!"

De Warden shake he head and say Nex!!

He ask de 2nd madman...."How much is 9 multiply by 7?"

De 2nd madman bawl out without hesitation..."CHEESE!!!"

De Warden watchin he guards hard now.  He say.."Allyuh say dis is de best!!  Dis is wha allyuh bring fuh meh?!!"

He take a deep breath and ask de 3rd madman...."How much is 9 multiply by 7?"

De 3rd madman scratch he head, frown, dig he nose, shiff from one foot to de nex, and den bawl out...."63!!!"

De warden clap he hands and say "YES!!!!  FINALLY!!!  What is your name young man?"

De 3rd madman say "Dey does call meh George sir"

Warden say..."Well George....as a man of my word....you are free to go back to society.  Go back to your room, get cleaned up, pack your things and go with my blessings"

So as de 3 madmen goin back to dey rooms now....de fuss 2 slappin George on he back and congratulatin him and ting.  Madman #2 ask him..."But George...how u get dah one right sah?"

Hear George....."Allyuh think I wasn't lissenin.  I lissen close.  Is simple maths man.  All I do is take away 17 from CHEESE!!"

 

[no1londontrinichic]

well this is most shit i eva read...but if it is them boiz n them i doh think they wod tek it in dat way but neways girl is ah good ting we doh ha balls

[Feliziano]

so is that why i does get migraines eh?
ah guess ah have to stop wearing meh tight underwear with meh football shorts with netting too lol .

[Warrior Prince]

d first one waz kicks d secound one FAIL BAD 2