A man crying in his beer and his friends says 'whats the matter?'
He says 'My wife is seeing another man, but I can't prove it'
'Why don't you buy a parrot' says his friend
' My wife is having an affair and you want me to buy a parrot, what drugs are you on? says the man.
'Well' says his friend,'Parrots can talk so all you have to do is ask the parrot to spy on your wife, and there you are, proof'
Impressed and feeling a lot better, the man went to the pet shop and he asks the man 'I want to buy a talking parrot'
'We don't have any'
'Well do you have any bird that can talk?'
'Yes we do. We have a talking budgie but there is one problem' says th shop assistant
'What's that? asks tha man
'Well, he don't have any legs'
'How does he sit on his perch then?' asks the man
'He wraps his manhood around it'
'As long as he can talk, I don't care' says the man as he pays the pet shop man his money.
He took the budgie home and the next morning he says to the bird ' Right Birchie' (that was the budgies name) I want you to tell me eveything that goes on with my wife, ok?'
'OK' says the budgie
'I'm going to work now so I'll see you tonight'
That night when his wife was having a shower the man says to the Budgie 'Ok Birchie, what happened when I went to work?'
The Budgie says 'After you left, there was a knock at the door and a big man came in, and your wife was wearing sexy clothes. They started to kiss, then he sat down and your wife started to dance slowly and sexily in front of him. She then started to strip off slowly, first her shirt and then her skirt'
'What happened next?' said the man impatiently
'Well, she took off her bra and then very very slowly she started to slide down her black lace knickers exposing her gorgious ass'
'What happened next?' shouted the man as the Budgie stopped speaking
'I don't know' answered Birchie
'Why not?' wimpered the man
'Well' said the budgie 'I fell off my perch'
