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Author Topic: English; The official language of Europe  (Read 2425 times)

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Offline PortValeChris

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English; The official language of Europe
« on: November 29, 2005, 03:17:08 PM »
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will
>be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
>the other possibility.
>
>As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
>spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in
>plan that would become known as "Euro-English". In the first year, "s" will
>replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with
>joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
>konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
>
>There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the second year when the
>troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
>fotograf 20% shorter. In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling
>kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are
>possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which
>have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the
>horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go
>away.
>
>By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with
>"z" and "w" with "v".
>
>During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"
>and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no
>mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza.
>Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
>
>Und nach dem fünften Jahr, wir werden alle Englisch sprechen
 
 

>
PortValeChris  AKA The Former TVV from onevalefan. 

Port Vale  We want ah goal!!


To market, to market, with my uncle Jim
Somebody threw a tomato at him
Now, Tomatoes don't hurt with their soft juicy skin
But this one it knackered, 'cause it come in a tin

truetrini

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Re: English; The official language of Europe
« Reply #1 on: November 29, 2005, 04:56:16 PM »
lol

Offline capodetutticapi

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Re: English; The official language of Europe
« Reply #2 on: December 03, 2005, 03:06:34 PM »
adolf would have been proud.
soon ah go b ah lean mean bulling machine.

Offline canadiantrini

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Re: English; The official language of Europe
« Reply #3 on: December 05, 2005, 05:56:11 PM »
 :rotfl:

Offline naps_girl_7

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Re: English; The official language of Europe
« Reply #4 on: December 15, 2005, 07:11:37 PM »
 :rotfl: nice
T&T... WE WANT AH GOAL!!!

Offline trinidad badboy

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Re: English; The official language of Europe
« Reply #5 on: December 16, 2005, 04:14:19 PM »
good one  :rotfl:

 

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