Cinderella
We all know how Cinderella wanted to go to the ball but her wicked
stepmother wouldn't let her, and then the fairy godmother pops up
and gives Cinderella some good news:
The fairy godmother tells Cinderella that she will provide for her
everything she needs to go to the ball, but only on 2 conditions.
Cinderella asks what she needs to do and the fairy godmother replies,
"First, you must wear a diaphragm." Cinderella's mouth drops open
and says, "You must be crazy! I'm on the pill, and I don't need to
wear a diaphragm." The fairy godmother reminds Cinderella about all
the handsome princes that will be attending the ball that night, and
Cinderella agrees to wear a diaphragm.
"Well, what's the second condition?" Cinderella asked.
The fairy godmother replies, "You must be back home at 2:00 AM.
Well, Cinderella explains that if she's gonna go party with the
princes, she wants to be out all night long. The fairy godmother
tells Cinderella that if she's not home by 2AM, then her diaphragm
will turn into a pumpkin and reminds her that at least she'll be
with the princes most of the evening, so Cinderella agrees to be home
at 2AM.
At 2AM, Cinderella doesn't show up...3AM, no Cinderella...4AM, no
Cinderella...finally, at 5AM, Cinderella shows up at the door with a
huge grin on her face.
The fairy godmother stands up and looks at Cinderella and says,
"Where the hell have you been? Your diaphragm was supposed to turn into
a pumpkin 3 hours ago!!!"
Cinderella tells the fairy godmother that she met a prince and he took
care of it for her. The fairy godmother wonders about a prince with
this type of power and asks Cinderella his name to which she replies,
"I can't remember, but it was Peter Peter something or other.
