Sam interview with the TTFF and others.
By: Samuel Edwards (SWO Member).
Sam - So Lincoln Phillips, I hear yuh want to knee-jerk Latapy, excatly wha yuh mean by knee-jerk, is it like jerk he chicken, fly he kyte, spank he monket, excatly wha yuh mean by knee-jerk ?
LP - Sam, allyuh on that site does take thing differently, I am just trying to say, allyuh dont jump down on Latapy just yet, give him a chance, we still have to discuss what happened in Martinique before a decission is made, Latapy is a black man and he from we local soil, we have to support him doh matter what. Rome wasn't built in 1 day.
Sam - But ent you went Martinique with the team.
LP - Yes, but ah was on de bench and end up dropping ah sleep and didn't get to see de games to good. Strange how it happen three times, like them fellas give meh broclacks.
Sam - So where do we go from here.
LP - I eh know where you going Sam, but I going in de toliet, that blasted broclacks starting to wok meh belly and then ah going in my office and call my children in American on SKYPE. I have to utilize my time because Jack out of de country and I want to take advantage of that, because when that man come back it go be real pressure down here, my ass go bun more than it bunning right now with that broclacks.
(((ring))) (((ring))), speaking bout de devil, hold on Sam, I have to get this, hello, Lincoln here, [yea, Jack here, yuh fadda], oh yes, sir how yuh trip going, [doh bull shit me, I hear we lost in Martinique], yes sir, we lost, [well every man Jack dead when I come back, yuh better drink Pepto-Bismol] .... hang up !!!!!!!!!..... beep, beep, beep....
LP - Sorry, Sam, ah have to cut this interview lil short, de boss coming soon and I have to go and vacum he office.
Sam - Ok, no problem, but before yuh go, what is Jack number, ah want to call him.
LP - Is, 868 - shit prick, but doh tell no body eh.
Sam - calling Jack...
(((ring))) (((ring))), hello, Jack here, talk tuh, tuh, tuh meh.. [this is Sam, remember me], off course, de, de, de, de forking trouble maker from Flex site, [yea, me self, ah have ah question] ... go ahead.... [so I hear the players win they money, finally], Sam, how long now you know Jack eh, look, me eh no asshole, I bring Birchall on this team, I discover him, Cox and Hislop came to play T&T at retirement age, Evans Wise play three games, Kelvin Jack play one world cup game vs Paraguay, Stern John eh score one blasted goal in de world cup, and he in de top 10 chart for most goals for they country, Sancho score a own goal and Andrews eh play one single game in de 2006 WC, but them want millions, listen to me Sam, they not getting a blasted cent, and that judge Devindra Rampersad days numbered, ask yuh self where Rajendra Narine gone, de first judge, I have de Attorney General Anand Ramlogan in my back pocket, Kamla Persad-Bissessar is my puppet, Andrew Jenning releasing somethnig everyweek and he cah reach yet, England PM Gordon Brown, de Queen, De Australian FA and Barrack Obama on they knees right now and I go let some dotish retired players sue me, yuh mad.!!!!!!! Expect to see Vodafone and Umbro to be we next sponsors and a English/Scottish coach, ah have Scottish born Jim Fallon in mind.
Sam - So wha yuh think bout Latapy and T&T poor showing in Martinique.
Jack - Me eh see de game, but ah hear of it and ah not happy, somebody go get bull when ah reach back in T&T. Ah bringing ah surprise for them. Hold on Sam [Aahhhh, ah done Jack, yuh cool now, my mouth tired ?], yea Sepp, get up and go get some whips for meh]. Sam, I have to go and take a shower, call Ollie, he number is 868 - kaka hole.
Sam - Callin Oliver Camps.
(((ring))) (((ring))), hello, Camps here.
Sam - Is me Sam.
Camps - Or, is you Sammy... how yuh going ?
Sam - Well I day, fighting it. Ah have a question for you, what yuh thing bout Latapy and he coaching.
Camps - Latapy is the best thing to happen to T&T football on de field and now off, he love women and love party, he is a "party crasher and a panty snatcher" as allyuh does say it in America, look Lara and Yorke calling he whole month now, Christmas around de corner and Carnival right after, Latapy is an employee that cost us peanuts, throw him a party, invite two sketels, send him Tobago to play Golf and buy a cartoon of cigarettes and he happy, T&T football dead, why hire an expensive coach now Sam ?, we have no games for de whola next year, do de math Sam, besides, we need a scapegoat and Latapy is good for that. Anyhow, I have to go, Lincoln now call meh and say Jack coming, so I have to organize ah ride to pick him up in de airport. Look Latas number, call he - 868 dunce.
Sam - Callin Latas.
(((ring))) (((ring))), hello.
Sam - Sam here, yuh remember me.
Latas - How can I forget, yuh publish meh interview last time and make man real laugh at meh, wha yuh want this time, eh.
Sam - Ah next interview.... hah hah hah hah hah, but this time, it go be gentle.
Latas - Shoot.
Sam - What is yuh take on the Digicel tournament and do you feel yuh job secured.
Latas - Well Sam, them fellas play some good ball, de team growing in every game, look Junius James was 5-7 last month and now after de Martinique game we measure him again and he was 5-9, so yuh see, give them fellas time, I know I not certified, but I have real experience, I play for years in Europe's best league and I play at every level for T&T, I smoke from Newport to Malboro and coach Falkirk girls and under 14 mens teams, so is nuff weight I carring under my belt. As for my future, it safe, Lincoln vex but he eh have de balls to fire me and he even went in public and say allyuh doh jerk meh, he will instead, then Oliver Camps come out and say everything is a process and we all know de TTFF have no organization or process they does follow, so give them time Sam, man will boil down like baggie and forget about this soon, look Carnival round de corner, Trinis doh give a rats ass about anything, once music playing and drinks running.
Sam - So did you read de Fenwick article on your team in Martinique.
Latas - Yea, and he right, but de TTFF hate him and again, they dont listen, so Fenwick could bark all he want he words will fall on deaf ears. Ah like Fenwick as a coach though, he does hit them playwers nuff clout, they need that sometimes, but my problem with him is, if I bring him as my assistant, he will shine and eventually take my wok, so I figure, ah go hire a duncer man that me, Faustin came first, but he start smoking weed around de players in training and I had to let him go, now we have Ross Russell, ah like him because of his name, nothing more. And tell Fenwick to worry about Jabloteh and doh worry about me.
Sam - Ah see de team win vs Martinique when de game didn't matter.
Latas - Yea, them fellas ready now, and de game matter for me, it was a matter of fact and that we could play good when no pressure on our backs. Bring drinks, Bring drinks, is paranging we pranging tonight.... opps, sorry....
Sam - So you feel we was under prepared, because Grenada warm up vs a US University team and Martinique didn't get to play any warm ups, so wasn't they under prepared as well. And didn't you know about de DCC cup a while now.
Latas - I cant think so far ahead, is one day at a time and as for de team, well, T&T players are like a box of chocolate, you never know what to expect until you open it, ask Forrest Gump. ho ho ho ho....
Sam - I see we play 3 games and used 3 different teams.
Latas - Its all part of the plan Sam, expose all them fellas, remember them men playing for free, so what more can we really asked of them, look LP getting he money from de government, thousands a month, I getting my Golf and liming money, so we happy and this is why we decide to make the players happy to, is game they want, give them game. Look Dexter Skeene planning de FA Cup de same time T&T have games..... them fellas go get game...
Sam - Last question, how much cigarettes yuh could smoke at once and how do you feel when de team lose?
Latas - Sam boy, I startnig to like yuh, that is de best question of de night. I try that a few times, and I could smoke ah enteir pack (20) at one time, trust me, and every week I go Tobago to play Golf ah does do that or when ah liming in Troters. As for when de team lose, them is big man and if they cant carry out instructions, then screw them, my philosophy is, if man willing to pay for they own taxi, they welcome to join de T&T team, look Jamal Gay eh play football over 8 months now and he broke but yet he does be here first in training. Look them players eh get paid since de Chile game and them still playing football, not only cant thse players read de game, but they eh reading de play either and what really going on. We heading for ah next court case soon, butm them eh have de heart to go de extra mile like de 2006 WC team. When saying so, talking about court, off de record Sammy... Why yuh think, me eh sue de TTFF, me and Yorke was promised the coaching job if we didn't. I got the job, bring Yorke to make him lil happy and then when enough time pass where he couldn't sue the TTFF again, ah drop he ass like ah hot polorie. To be a good coach, you have to be whatless. Alright Sam, I have to go, look Lara calling meh.
Sam - Calling Adidas.
Adidas - Mike speaking how can I help you.
Sam - This is Sam in relation to T&T football and they sponsor with you guys, I have a question.
Adidas- Go ahead.
Sam - Do you know its been almost 5 years since you guys came and sponsor T&T and the federation and players are still fighting over money from what you guys gave them.
Adidas- Mr Sam, I am glad you call us, I keep up with the matter and I was very disappointed, all I can say is, watch how black people does ack like crabs in barrel, yuh throw money on the ground and they raffing and fighting for it like it was life, instead of shareing it among each other evenly because they all earnered it, they fighting for it like they have no class, no wonder de white man will always be their bosses, black man dont have unity. Ok, bye Sam.
Sam - Take care Mike, by de way, can I have a shirt ?
Adidas - No !!!!!!!!!!!!!! .... beep, beep, beep, please call back, you have been disconnected.