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Author Topic: The rules of men  (Read 1017 times)

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Offline trinindian

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The rules of men
« on: January 17, 2006, 11:24:47 PM »
We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules  from the male side.

Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

Saturday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be

Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

Crying is blackmail.
                         Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:
                         Subtle hints do not work!
                         Strong hints do not work!
                         Obvious hints do not work!
                         JUST SAY IT!

‘Yes’ and ‘No’ are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question

Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for

A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor

Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days

If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us

If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both ,if you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself

Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials

Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we

ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle

If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear

When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine, Really

Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as: Sex, Sports or Cars

You have enough clothes

You have too many shoes

I am in shape. Round is a shape.

 

Offline TriniItalian

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Re: The rules of men
« Reply #1 on: January 19, 2006, 08:24:30 PM »
 :rotfl: lol
A.W.A.T.T. INFORMANT

 

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