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Author Topic: speeding ticket  (Read 951 times)

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Offline trinidad badboy

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speeding ticket
« on: June 18, 2006, 02:05:29 PM »
An older lady gets pulled over for speeding...
Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?

Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding.

Older Woman: Oh, I see.

Officer: Can I see your license please?

Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.

Officer: Don't have one?

Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving.

Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.

Older Woman: I can't do that.

Officer: Why not?

Older Woman: I stole this car.

Officer: Stole it?

Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.

Officer: You what?

Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see

The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.

Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please! The woman steps out of her vehicle.

Older woman: Is there a problem sir?

Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.

Older Woman: Murdered the owner?

Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.

The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?

Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers. The officer is quite stunned.

Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license.

The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer.

The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.

Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.

Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too.

Offline jose

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Re: speeding ticket
« Reply #1 on: June 18, 2006, 02:43:31 PM »
yeah i like that one ;D ;D ;D :devil: :rotfl:

Offline TriniCana

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Re: speeding ticket
« Reply #2 on: June 19, 2006, 02:27:44 PM »
datz my grandmudda

ah like it  :rotfl: :rotfl:

Offline Organic

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Re: speeding ticket
« Reply #3 on: June 19, 2006, 02:46:00 PM »
 :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:
Perhaps the epitome of a Trinidadian is the child in the third row class with a dark skin and crinkly plaits who looks at you out of decidedly Chinese eyes and announces herself as Jacqueline Maharaj.- Merle Hodge

Offline Lil Jodie P

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Re: speeding ticket
« Reply #4 on: June 19, 2006, 06:09:49 PM »
hummmmmmmmmmmmmm good one....
ah taking notes here....meh foot kinda heavy!
FOREVER AND ALWAYS "Little Jodie P" :)

Offline PortValeChris

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Re: speeding ticket
« Reply #5 on: June 20, 2006, 10:14:32 AM »
I have been trying to remember this joke for months so that I could post it here but I jsut couldn't think how it went.  Great one that.
PortValeChris  AKA The Former TVV from onevalefan. 

Port Vale  We want ah goal!!

To market, to market, with my uncle Jim
Somebody threw a tomato at him
Now, Tomatoes don't hurt with their soft juicy skin
But this one it knackered, 'cause it come in a tin

Offline sprog

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Re: speeding ticket
« Reply #6 on: June 22, 2006, 10:03:04 AM »