Britain or Robust.
Opinion By: Lasana Liburd - T&T Express.
Britain's memory of Trinidad and Tobago will always be, first and foremost, the toothy grin of former Manchester United star Dwight Yorke, who, at present, is the seventh highest English Premier League scorer of all time.
Likewise, Trinidad and Tobago's perception of the UK leagues was forever altered by Yorke's phenomenal success at football's richest club.
It is the impossible yardstick that measures Stern John, Kenwyne Jones and the future wave of exports.
As gifted as Yorke is, it is uncertain whether even he could manage it given a second try. His healthy goal returns were no fluke; but his rise was.
There is something asymmetrical about Yorke and England. Something that explains why Yorke, at 33 and with 122 Premiership goals, is surplus to requirements at the top level while elder and less talented or prolific marksmen such as West Brom's Kevin Campbell, 35, are still considered key players.
Last summer, Graeme Souness dumped his two experienced 33-year-old strikers from Blackburn Rovers. Andy Cole is now the Fulham captain. Yorke is virtually a memory at Birmingham City where he can no longer even claim a spot on the substitutes' bench.
It is not that Yorke has faded faster. Rather, he was paddling upstream from the start.
Remember when ITV and BBC swooned over his charming smile as he plundered goals for United? They failed to mention that former Aston Villa manager "Big" Ron Atkinson was so sick at the sight of Yorke's gums that he ordered teammate Ugo Ehiogu to punch him at training sessions to "toughen him up".
Reporters also forget to mention the odds stacked against Yorke from the offset at Manchester United, partly because they put them there in the first place. He was considered a certain flop even before his debut. Yorke, they opined, just did not have the quality or temperament to survive at such a big club.
The reservations were not restricted to outside the club either. United manager Sir Alex Ferguson endured a whispering campaign started by his own assistant, Brian Kidd, that the esteemed boss was off his rocker.
Kidd felt that Ferguson would get better value from rugged Wales and Celtic striker John Hartson. The same Hartson who almost decapitated Israeli playmaker Eyal Berkovic in a pick-up match-and that was his teammate!
I was drilled once on the impressive composure of Trinidad and Tobago and Portsmouth goalkeeper Shaka Hislop by "Pompey" fans, who were certain they knew his secret and sought confirmation.
"He takes a little puff, don't he mate?" asked one supporter, who motioned as though drawing from an imaginary cigarette. Only he was clearly referring to something stronger than Benson and Hedges.
I denied the suggestion politely but firmly. I could tell that they were unconvinced.
Britain's perception of the Caribbean, at least at ground level, has not changed much over the decades. Nice blokes, they say with a smile but wistful nod. It is a double-edged compliment. Britain likes mean players.
I was introduced to an English lower league club CEO recently and immediately asked about some Trinidad and Tobago players his squad hosted for trials.
"They were okay," he said, pulling a face. "But they need some unngh!"
I thought of some local players who might have the desired personality traits. There was CL Financial San Juan Jabloteh's combative midfielder Travis Mulraine, who I am convinced, can earn a good living in Britain, as well as his club teammate and powerful national defender Keyeno Thomas. Conrad Smith could pull it off as well because of his versatility and ambition. Maybe Defence Force midfielder Kurt Williams too, if he secured a work permit.
But, with all due respect, these are not Trinidad and Tobago's most gifted players, are they?
In Britain, football is played with the heart first and legs second. Perhaps that explains why Yorke has not quite received the respect he deserves and John never will-not in this country.
Mulraine and Thomas have the right blend of skill, strength and sass to make a mark in the UK and are good assets for any coach. But, to be honest, I prefer the artistry of Nigel Pierre, Kerry Baptiste, Silvio Spann and Kerwyn "Hardest" Jemmott.
God forbid that any agent tries to turn any of that latter bunch into British-styled players.
I have seen little of Caledonia Fire midfielder Densil Theobold over the past two years but I shuddered at the news that he was set for trials at Queen's Park Rangers before an injury. QPR is to football what heavy metal is to music; a lot of angry noise and collisions with little perceivable talent. I saw them play in January and wondered whether their manager recruited at karate exhibitions or maybe from tug-of-war contests.
Results show that QPR's style of play is not altogether unsuccessful and they might even sneak a League Championship Play-off spot. But it escapes me why any agent would want to send a Trinidad and Tobago player there.
The obsession with British football, in my opinion, is doing our country's self-esteem more harm than good. The Trinidad and Tobago Football Federation (T&TFF) would benefit greatly from a few well-placed European-based agents.
I would suggest Holland straightaway although I am biased since it is the only country I visited, to date, on Europe's mainland.
But Holland's preference for technical skills over less aesthetic qualities would surely be more homely to T&T's players. There is also a surfeit of Caribbean success stories from Ruud Gullit and Frank Rijkaard to Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink and Clarence Seedorf.
The lifestyle too is slower and more laidback. It is colder but not as gloomy and most Dutch persons speak English.
Racial integration also appears better there than Britain and certainly dwarves Spain, where ignoramuses still embarrass themselves by making monkey noises at their league's finest and best paid players.
It is not easy to flourish in an alien culture. There is the strange weather and food, different ideas about tackling and skill as well as the abundance of xenophobes.
Trinidad and Tobago has held her own nicely. To date, the "Land of the Hummingbird" can boast of 16 players who play professionally in the UK-excluding the players who kicked their first ball in England.
None has done better than Yorke while Hislop, John, Russell Latapy, Clint Marcelle and Marvin Andrews, to name a few, enjoyed successes or more fulfilling careers than many of their British counterparts.
A word to the future stars, though. There is professional life outside Britain.
