I hope this is new
Things My Mother Taught Me.........
1. My Mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait till yuh father come home."
2. My Mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"What yuh say? Come here let me give yuh what I have fuh yuh!"
3. My Mother taught me to MEET A CHALLENGE.
"What di backside yuh was thinkin'? Answer me when ah
talk to yuh...Don't talk back to me!"
4. My Mother taught me CONSEQUENCES.
"If yuh run across de road an' cyar lick yuh dong, a goin' kill yuh wid licks."
5 My Mother taught me the value of good Education.
"If yuh doh go to school, yuh go tun tief or walk an' sweep de road."
6. My Mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If yuh keep on ah tun over yuh eye lid an' fly lan on it, it go stay so forever."
7. My Mother taught me ESP.
"Yu tink ah don't know what yuh up to nah?"
8. My Mother taught me HUMOR.
"If yuh don' eat yuh food, people go say yuh mirasmee."
9. My Mother taught me how to BECOME AN ADULT.
"Come an' take yuh licking like ah man."
10. My Mother taught me about SEX.
"Yu tink yuh drop from de sky or off ah tree, yuh have stem??"
11. My Mother taught me about GENETICS.
"Yu jus' like yuh dam father."
12. My Mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Weh yuh tink I come from Embacadere?"
13. My Mother taught me about WISDOM OF AGE.
"When yuh get to be as ol' as me, yuh go understan'."
14. And my all time favorite... JUSTICE.
"One day wen yuh have yuh own chirren, ah hope dey treat yuh de same way."
