Satirical shorts: Racist twit violates Balotelli AND Ebola; Watch-out: Platini reveals his Jack Warner education; and small-minded Pellegrino gets hot for MourinhoBashing Balotelli, timeless Platini and small-minded Pellegrino
By Mr Live Wired (Wired868.com)
Liverpool striker Mario Balotelli saw something that tickled him during Manchester United’s controversial 5-3 loss to newly promoted Leicester City yesterday and tweeted: “Man Utd... LOL.”
Naturally, it was met with an explosive response from sad, little “fans” who saw it as an excuse to abuse the 24-year-old Italian football star.
The moment of Zen was provided by @CraigSainsbury who responded: “Got eat some bananas and get ebola you dirty monkey.” It was, arguably, racist abuse and bizarre and misguided health warning in equal measure.
Even the dreaded Ebola disease might have felt violated after being exploited in that way.
Mr Live Wire thinks if doctors are still agonising over testing possible ebola vaccines, they should skip the chimpanzees and go straight to this clever twit.
Merseyside Police is investigating the abuse, which is better than Balotelli might have expected in Italy. After the selection of Carlo “Drive-out-banana-eaters” Tavecchio as Italy FA president, Serie A clubs might have at least made @CraigSainsbury an honorary FA director.
Speaking about dodgy officials, can someone ask UEFA president Michel Platini what time it is?
Platini, a former France and Juventus football hero, is either the first millionaire who can’t tell the difference between a watch of symbolic and trivial value—as permitted by FIFA’s rules for gifts—and a £16,000 Parmigiani watch. Either that or Platini felt a watch that cost as much as most Trinbagonians’ cars was just another piece of crap that he tossed in his socks’ drawer.
Regardless, the FIFA Ethics Committee declared that Platini and his fellow gift loving FIFA executive committee members would have to give the watches back.
And Platini, a man who openly supported the controversial Qatar 2022 World Cup bid, declared that FIFA president Sepp Blatter could try prising the watch from his cold, twisted corpse. We paraphrased slightly.
“I’m a well-educated person,” said Platini. “I don’t return gifts.”
Read more:
http://wired868.com/2014/09/22/satirical-shorts-bashing-balotelli-timeless-platini-and-small-minded-pellegrini/