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Author Topic: Call Centre Conversations  (Read 772 times)

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Offline WestCoast

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Call Centre Conversations
« on: October 16, 2006, 02:40:41 PM »
Actual call centre conversations !!!!!

Customer:     "I've been ringing 0800 2100 for two
days and can't get through to enquiries, can you
help?".
Operator:     "Where did you get that number from,
sir?"
Customer:     "It was on the door to the Travel
Centre".
Operator:     "Sir, they are our opening hours".

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Samsung Electronics
Caller:          "Can you give me the telephone number
for Jack?"
Operator:     "I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who
you are talking about".
Caller:          "On page 1, section 5, of the user
guide it clearly states that I need to unplug the fax
machine from the AC  wall socket and telephone Jack
before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for
Jack?"
Operator:      "I think you mean the telephone point
on the wall".
----------------------------------------------------------------------
RAC Motoring Services
Caller:          "Does your European Breakdown Policy
cover me when I am travelling in Australia?"

Operator:      " Doesn't the product name give you a
clue?"
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Caller (enquiring about legal requirements while
travelling in France):
"If I register my car in France, do I have to change
the steering wheel to the other side of the car?"
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Directory Enquiries
Caller:               "I'd like the number of the
Argoed Fish Bar in Cardiff please".
Operator:          "I'm sorry, there's no listing. Is
the spelling correct?"
Caller:               "Well, it used to be called the
Bargoed Fish Bar but the 'B' fell off".
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Then there was the caller who asked for a knitwear
company in Woven.
Operator:        "Woven? Are you sure?"
Caller:             "Yes. That's what it says on the
label; Woven in Scotland".
----------------------------------------------------------------------
On another occasion, a man making heavy breathing
sounds from a phone box told a worried operator:

"I haven't got a pen, so I'm steaming up the window to
write the number on".
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Tech Support:      "I need you to right-click on the
Open Desktop".
Customer:             "OK".
Tech Support:      "Did you get a pop-up menu?".
Customer:             "No".
Tech Support:      "OK. Right-Click again. Do you see
a pop-up menu?"
Customer:             "No".
Tech Support:      "OK, sir. Can you tell me what you
have done up until this point?".

 Customer:            "Sure. You told me to write
'click' and I wrote 'click'".
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Tech Support:          "OK. In the bottom left hand
side of the screen, can you see the 'OK' button
displayed?"
Customer:                 "Wow. How can you see my
screen from there?"
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Caller:  "I deleted a file from my PC last week and I
have just realised that I need it. If I turn my system
clock back two weeks will I have my file back again?".
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
There's always one. This has got to be one of the
funniest things in a long time. I think this guy
should have been promoted, not fired. This is a true
story from the Word Perfect Helpline, which was
transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer
care department. Needless to say the Help Desk
employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing
the Word Perfect organization for "Termination without
Cause".
Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer
Support employee. (Now I know why they record these
conversations!):

Operator:         "Ridge Hall, computer assistance;
may I help you?"
Caller:              "Yes, well, I'm having trouble
with WordPerfect."
Operator:         "What sort of trouble??"
Caller:              "Well, I was just typing along,
and all of a sudden the words went away."
Operator:         "Went away?"
Caller:              "They disappeared."
Operator:         "Hmm So what does your screen look
like now?"
Caller:              "Nothing."
Operator:         "Nothing??"
Caller:              "It's blank; it won't accept
anything when I type."
Operator:         "Are you still in WordPerfect, or
did you get out??"
Caller:              "How do I tell?"
Operator:         "Can you see the C: prompt on the
screen??"
Caller:              "What's a sea-prompt?"
Operator:         "Never mind, can you move your
cursor around the screen?"
Caller:              "There isn't any cursor: I told
you, it won't accept anything I type."
Operator:         "Does your monitor have a power
indicator??"
Caller:              "What's a monitor?"
Operator:         "It's the thing with the screen on
it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light
that tells you when it's on??"
Caller:               "I don't know."
Operator:          "Well, then look on the back of the
monitor and find where the power cord goes into it.
Can you see that??"
Caller:              "Yes, I think so."
Operator:         "Great. Follow the cord to the plug,
and tell me if it's plugged into the wall.

Caller:              "Yes, it is."
Operator:         "When you were behind the monitor,
did you notice that there were two cables plugged into
the back of it, not just one??"
Caller:               "No."
Operator:          "Well, there are. I need you to
look back there again and find the other cable."
Caller:               "Okay, here it is."
Operator:          "Follow it for me, and tell me if
it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."
Caller:               "I can't reach."
Operator:          "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it
is??"
Caller:               "No."
Operator:          "Even if you maybe put your knee on
something and lean way over??"
Caller:               "Oh, it's not because I don't
have the right angle - it's because it's dark."
Operator:          "Dark??"
Caller:               "Yes - the office light is off,
and the only light I have is coming in from the
window.

" Operator: "Well, turn on the office light then."
Caller:               "I can't."
Operator:          "No? Why not??"
Caller:               "Because there's a power
failure."
Operator:  "A power......... A power failure? Aha,
Okay, we've got it licked now.

Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing
stuff your computer came in??"

Caller:               "Well, yes, I keep them in the
closet."
Operator:           "Good. Go get them, and unplug
your system and pack it up just like it was when you
got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it
from."
Caller:                "Really? Is it that bad?"
Operator:            "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
Caller:                 "Well, all right then, I
suppose. What do I tell them??"
Operator:            "Tell them you're too damn
stupid to own a computer.
Whatever you do, do it to the purpose; do it thoroughly, not superficially. Go to the bottom of things. Any thing half done, or half known, is in my mind, neither done nor known at all. Nay, worse, for it often misleads.
Lord Chesterfield
(1694 - 1773)

Offline capodetutticapi

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Re: Call Centre Conversations
« Reply #1 on: October 16, 2006, 02:51:41 PM »
he had ah fukin right to tell de person that.
soon ah go b ah lean mean bulling machine.

Offline d1onlysexysugar

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Re: Call Centre Conversations
« Reply #2 on: October 16, 2006, 03:00:52 PM »
i can't believe dat people r sooooo stupid... i may have done d same ting if i was dat Rep. actually ... i may have used obscene  :devil:
ADM

 

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