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Author Topic: Tabancah Vibes  (Read 2830 times)

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Offline CK1

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Tabancah Vibes
« on: November 16, 2012, 06:50:18 PM »
I have the special opportunity to talk with my son about dealing with ah Tabancah...serious thing! I tell him every man experience this and only time will heal this so don't think yuh go dead :rotfl: would love to hear some remedies and experiences. This is a level 1 situation just a break up , no horn involved...or so he believe :banginghead:
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Offline Jah Gol

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Re: Tabancah Vibes
« Reply #1 on: November 16, 2012, 08:48:46 PM »
Like nobody want to respond  :rotfl:

Yeah only time really heals it but here I few things I did to help in the early stages :

Lock Off- Goes without saying , you have to lock her off. No communication and you definitely can't meet.

Talk- What you doing there is the right thing. Let him vent a lil bit to get it out but not too much to start wallowing in it.

Group Activities- Especially with male friends. Good natured humiliation and ole talk goes a long way.

Maintain ah order with yourself - Got this from my barber. Maintain a fresh, dress properly and smell good. This is maintain to build your confidence. If ever she sees you, you must at least look like you doing well without her

Music- This is where some dudes get tie up. Don't ever play songs that remind you of her. You have to listen to happy  music like soca even if you may be a fan . no love tunes anything too slow. I find myself listening to hip hop and not even a fan. Because most of it about confidence and bravado. Hubris is more useful than grief.

Exercise - That hurt used to cause me to almost feel a physical pain. It wouldn't leave unless I tricked my brain. I used to work out until I was either exhausted or in pain so my emotions would switch off for a lil bit. You wouldn't believe how effective it is. You get a sense a accomplishment and mental clarity almost like a high. It don't drink so that was my drug.

Do you - Whatever your passion is explore it to no end. Sport,  art , learning whatever. I started reading like crazy. I had exams and projects going on and my grades actually improved. Its important for young men to spend time developing some skill or any area of interest so WHEN this occurs they could rely on their passion to keep you for a while.

Replacements - I didn't recognise this immediately but everything I was doing to help myself was actually attracting more females. When I was ready I jump back in the game.

To me is only really one tabanca you could have. It gets easier after  ;D




Offline asylumseeker

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Re: Tabancah Vibes
« Reply #2 on: November 16, 2012, 08:51:27 PM »
I have the special opportunity to talk with my son about dealing with ah Tabancah...serious thing! I tell him every man experience this and only time will heal this so don't think yuh go dead :rotfl: would love to hear some remedies and experiences. This is a level 1 situation just a break up , no horn involved...or so he believe :banginghead:

 :)

Offline just cool

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Re: Tabancah Vibes
« Reply #3 on: November 17, 2012, 03:27:13 AM »
Like nobody want to respond  :rotfl:

Yeah only time really heals it but here I few things I did to help in the early stages :

Lock Off- Goes without saying , you have to lock her off. No communication and you definitely can't meet.

Talk- What you doing there is the right thing. Let him vent a lil bit to get it out but not too much to start wallowing in it.

Group Activities- Especially with male friends. Good natured humiliation and ole talk goes a long way.

Maintain ah order with yourself - Got this from my barber. Maintain a fresh, dress properly and smell good. This is maintain to build your confidence. If ever she sees you, you must at least look like you doing well without her

Music- This is where some dudes get tie up. Don't ever play songs that remind you of her. You have to listen to happy  music like soca even if you may be a fan . no love tunes anything too slow. I find myself listening to hip hop and not even a fan. Because most of it about confidence and bravado. Hubris is more useful than grief.

Exercise - That hurt used to cause me to almost feel a physical pain. It wouldn't leave unless I tricked my brain. I used to work out until I was either exhausted or in pain so my emotions would switch off for a lil bit. You wouldn't believe how effective it is. You get a sense a accomplishment and mental clarity almost like a high. It don't drink so that was my drug.

Do you - Whatever your passion is explore it to no end. Sport,  art , learning whatever. I started reading like crazy. I had exams and projects going on and my grades actually improved. Its important for young men to spend time developing some skill or any area of interest so WHEN this occurs they could rely on their passion to keep you for a while.

Replacements - I didn't recognise this immediately but everything I was doing to help myself was actually attracting more females. When I was ready I jump back in the game.

To me is only really one tabanca you could have. It gets easier after  ;D




Dah b!tch rel fack you up ?  ;D
The pen is mightier than the sword, Africa for Africans home and abroad.Trinidad is not my home just a pit stop, Africa is my destination,final destination the MOST HIGH.

Offline just cool

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Re: Tabancah Vibes
« Reply #4 on: November 17, 2012, 03:40:24 AM »
Breds, tell yuh son tuh build new memories with a new person, bc it's the memories weh does fack yuh up thinking you will never find another broad like her, as there's a line in the song "sarah" (i'll never find another girl like you).

tabanka is ah part of growing up, if ah man never experience ah tabanka then he's extremely lucky. when i was dating my fuss wife she wind up leaving me bc i used tuh buss dat arse (not bc i was evil, but she used tuh rel push buttons and i was young and didn't know how tuh handle dat).

anyway, she left me and ride out, move and relocate, i search fuh dat byiach until i find she, but that six month without she was hell, ah did rel love dah woman, despite she was a nag and never wanted tuh lose her again, anyway i married the B...... and made her an honest woman, two yrs into the marriage she wanted out, hear nah, that nearly fack me up horse.

finally my yardie breddren ah old veteran told me to move on, i told him i can't , he asked why and i said , bc of all the memories we shared together i will miss dat, the bredder told me, "man find ah new ting and make new memories." and he was right, bc after that i rel date nicer kinder women than she and in the end find ah rel sweet ting tuh chill wid.

time is really ah phenomenal ting yes.

right now if i see ah dog fackin she in the middle of time sq i wont even bat and eye or care in the least.
« Last Edit: November 17, 2012, 02:15:10 PM by just cool »
The pen is mightier than the sword, Africa for Africans home and abroad.Trinidad is not my home just a pit stop, Africa is my destination,final destination the MOST HIGH.

Offline Jah Gol

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Re: Tabancah Vibes
« Reply #5 on: November 17, 2012, 09:38:49 AM »


Quote
Dah b!tch rel fack you up ?  ;D
make me better actually

Offline CK1

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Re: Tabancah Vibes
« Reply #6 on: November 17, 2012, 10:02:20 AM »
JG & JC: appreciate the responses breds, I have told him much the same things both of you have said. Even told him my own experienc...cried for weeks - oh gad oh! Can' beleive she do dat to me  :cursing:
But as JG say, made me a better man. I told my son I would post this on here so he could see that he is not the first and won't be the last man to go through this. I'm glad that he and I have this kind of relationship, knowing that I couldn't have this kind of talk with my own father....that's another topic.
Blessings!
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Offline just cool

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Re: Tabancah Vibes
« Reply #7 on: November 17, 2012, 02:19:45 PM »


Quote
Dah b!tch rel fack you up ?  ;D
make me better actually
just humoring jah, i know de feelin well.

when it happened to me i rel wild out and monkey meh self like i din have no sense. boy!! the things ah daughter could do to ah fella wid no experience and unworldy. ah shame tuh even think bout it.     :rotfl: :rotfl:        :beermug:
The pen is mightier than the sword, Africa for Africans home and abroad.Trinidad is not my home just a pit stop, Africa is my destination,final destination the MOST HIGH.

Offline NYtriniwhiteboy..

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Re: Tabancah Vibes
« Reply #8 on: November 17, 2012, 02:51:25 PM »
A "who ain't dead badly wounded" lime with he boys where dey shit up de person suffering to the point that he can't do anyting but laugh and realize he go live
Back in Trini...

giggsy11

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Re: Tabancah Vibes
« Reply #9 on: November 17, 2012, 06:58:56 PM »
1. Lose the phone number-to avoid tipsy texting and or drunk dialing
2. Stay away from people, places and things that will lead to nostalgic feelings/longings
3. Spend time with people who will respect what you are goingv thru and not keep asking how you are doing
4. Stay active or throw your time and energy into something that gives you fulfillment/try something new
5. Cry and feel sorry for yourself, until you feel pathetic enough not to go there anymore
6. Get a pet or if you have one enjoy it
7.  Chase away p***y with p***y to keep your ego intact
8. Accept it happened for a reason
9. Review and see it for what it was/is, and plan not to repeat history

Dealing with my own tabanca right now.

Dumplingdinho

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Re: Tabancah Vibes
« Reply #10 on: November 17, 2012, 08:39:23 PM »

jah gol could write ah book, he cover almost everything.

good input, i think everybody cover the main actions in dealing with a tabanca.  the barber example is very good, the last tabanca i had mih barber make out de scene without i even saying anything, i guess i was looking real depressed...he told me look sharp at all times, as a matter of fact look even better without de gyul.  he even provide 2 free haircuts for me.

ck1 tell yuh son all these recommendations will help but at the end of the day only time cures ah tabanca.  there will be good days and bad days.  the challenge is how u handle de bad days...i eh know how old yuh son is but me on bad days will brush something, lime with mih pardnas or workout.  the workout scene works wonders plus it will help with the looking better scene as well.

Offline STEUPS!!

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Re: Tabancah Vibes
« Reply #11 on: November 18, 2012, 11:17:16 AM »
What do you do when U are working with the 'ex' tho? because that is my situation right now  ::) You are forced to be in each others face and space everyday
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Offline ProudTrinbagonian

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Re: Tabancah Vibes
« Reply #12 on: November 18, 2012, 05:07:19 PM »

Replacements - I didn't recognise this immediately but everything I was doing to help myself was actually attracting more females. When I was ready I jump back in the game.

To me is only really one tabanca you could have. It gets easier after  ;D


 :beermug:
Tell your son the best is yet to come...they say hell hath no fury like a woman scorned?
Well a man gone through a tabanca successfully does turn into the biggest ladies man...all of the best killers go through this
« Last Edit: November 18, 2012, 05:09:25 PM by ProudTrinbagonian »
whey boy!

Offline Jah Gol

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Re: Tabancah Vibes
« Reply #13 on: November 18, 2012, 07:08:40 PM »
What do you do when U are working with the 'ex' tho? because that is my situation right now  ::) You are forced to be in each others face and space everyday
Hmm , yuh have fight through the awkwardness until the feelings normalize. There's no easy way with this one.

Offline lefty

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Re: Tabancah Vibes
« Reply #14 on: November 19, 2012, 07:00:06 AM »
What do you do when U are working with the 'ex' tho? because that is my situation right now  ::) You are forced to be in each others face and space everyday

u good.... I doh do dat atall..........ah goh make ah chupid joke....here and there......and still it will be more with people dat have no right or cause to take me seriously, but I doh hunt on d company reserve........yes there are quite spectacular creatures roamin dem plain eh, but no girl... not me and dat.
I pity the fool....

Offline Dutty

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Re: Tabancah Vibes
« Reply #15 on: November 19, 2012, 08:03:20 AM »
I agree with most here that a dead clean break is the best, but since yuh say de boy cryin an ting I strongly recommend the No.7 suggestion from Giggsy
OTOH I forget CK1 is a man strong with he bible ,, so dat kinda kinda slackness eh go fly in he house

I suggest you be a good dad and get the boy at least a date with a nice church girl…….with D cups and ah bad rep :devil:
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Offline CK1

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Re: Tabancah Vibes
« Reply #16 on: November 19, 2012, 02:20:36 PM »
I agree with most here that a dead clean break is the best, but since yuh say de boy cryin an ting I strongly recommend the No.7 suggestion from Giggsy
OTOH I forget CK1 is a man strong with he bible ,, so dat kinda kinda slackness eh go fly in he house

I suggest you be a good dad and get the boy at least a date with a nice church girl…….with D cups and ah bad rep :devil:

# 7 would have been on my list too ;D but thank GOD I know better now and could be a good dad and teach my son some good things about manhood and decision making. I've shared these responses with him and it was fruitful for him to see the similarities of what I've already said; that along with the light hearted humor is a plus. He's been hanging with his boys and also working on his new CD so that's keeping him focused.
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Offline 100% Barataria

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Re: Tabancah Vibes
« Reply #17 on: November 19, 2012, 05:43:33 PM »
10. Allow your faith and spirituality to aid in healing your wounds and rebuilding your self esteem and overall persona while maintaining a positive outlook on life, love and relationships
Education is our passport for the future for the future belongs to those who prepare for it today

 

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