September 22, 2021, 02:40:10 AM

Author Topic: Lawrence, DJW, Skeene and de crew open up interviews.  (Read 1896 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Sam

  • Hero Warrior
  • *****
  • Posts: 8229
  • Police face and dog heart.
    • View Profile
Lawrence, DJW, Skeene and de crew open up interviews.
« on: February 14, 2017, 10:35:56 AM »
Lawrence, DJW, Skeene and de crew open up interviews.
By Samuel Edwards [swo editor at large].


Sam: So Dennis Lawrence, how yuh pull off that job boy.
Lawrence: Well Sam, I tell David John Williams that I will wok for free for de first 8 qualifiers and he told me, that sounds good, so he give me a full contract for 2 years, because in 2 years we will only be playing 8 qualifiers because de next setta world cup qualifiers start back in 4 years, so for de next 2 years I go be job secured, Mike Berry do de maths for me, he use to wok for Jack and them, yuh remember him, right.. he good with numbers, he use to charge Carlos Edwards and them lil money for contract, I think Carlos just finish making his last installment 2 weeks ago for he Wrexham contract, so Berry is good because he takes his pay in consignment..

Sam: Yea, look Mike Berry here, lemeh ask him a question, Berry, ah see yuh still around, yuh doing coaching scouts now, yuh drop de players agent wok?
Berry: Yes mate, I drop that work a long time mate, since Kelvin Jack rob me mate I'm done with that for now,,,, so I'm all up for helping guys get coaching job now. You see I help Lawrence get a job with the TTFA even though I didn't make money on this deal,,,,, but Lawrence promise me that he will cap W Connection players and I will be their agent to get foreign contract for them and that I will be back on the player agent scene. This way, everybody wins, Lawrence will get a kick back for any signings,,,,, DJW will get his transfer money and players will get contract,,,, I use to charge 40%, now, when you add VAT and other stuff, it go be 55% plus free totie, sorry, I meant roti for a year. I love Trini food, Jack Warner use to fed-ex it for me every week in exchange for contracts for his Joe Public players. I even apply to be de TTFA scout and they accepted it,,,, I'm trying to secure Bobby Zamora for the next set of games. Expect a lot of changes Sam but dont expect Bostock to play for T&T, I will tell you the reason why oneday..

Sam: Sol Campbell, is me Sam, Dennis give me your number, when you planning to come to T&T and how you feel about de job.
Sol: I am proud mate, I want to make T&T happy and I will be there the day before we play Panama to take up duties, I was only singed for the remainder of the qualifiers,,,, me and Dennis did a coaching course together and we became close and he promise me the job even though de only experience I have as a coach was when I was coaching a blind team in the Manchester Home For The Blind League, we won that year, there was 2 teams competing and this was de first time we won the trophy. Dennis was very impressed and he told me you are hired,,,, with your accent you getting any pussy in T&T and I accepted it, this way it will off set de little pay I getting from de TTFA, I figure, yuh have to pay for pussy, so why not have it deducted from your pay and the good thing is, its before taxes,,,, at least you wouldn't feel it, I hear is nuff Venezuelans living in T&T now,,,, DJW told me he want to use me as a commentator for de games to, he already spoke with Andre Baptiste to bring me on board i95.5 for T&T games and CT105 for W Connection games. From a blind league to being responsible for a country is a big accomplishment, I was a defender and Dennis was a defender, so our team will be conceding less goals, we may not score any, but at least we are safe in the back. Dennis even mention that he might run out for the Mexico and Panama games, he seriously considering it, he still remembers the goal he score against Panama, he want to show the world that it was no fluke, besides, if they could call back Glen and Carlos Edwards, why cant Dennis play to? Sam,,,,,, you know if Kevin Harrison and Terry Fenwick still living in T&T, I need to link up with some Englishmen when I get there so I will feel right at home.,,, I also promise DJW I will get Shahdon a trial with Spurs, I still have connection there, you know this Shahdon fella?

Sam: Mr Roberto Martinez, Dennis give me your number, I want to say hi and how you feel about Dennis new wok.
Roberto: Boy thank God he gone, the man was like a tick in my ass,,,,, he was on me like a lonely farmer in a sheep pen on a rainy day,,,,,, since he was with Wigan I wanted to get rid of him, but he price was unbeatable, you cant beat freebies. His accent use to scare de players in the locker room and he use to stutter a lot so by de time he say "hello fellas, lets talk about the first half",,,,, half time ova and players gone back on de field, this is de reason we failed when I coach Everton, de players didn't feel motivated enough,,,, then he follow me to Belgium and was scouting for we, he find 2 players for us, de only thing is, they was already retired, so you guys good to go because Dennis have a good track record in that field, at least he find two.

Sam: So David John Williams, how you managing boy.
DJW: You see Sam, I dont like you and Contro and I planning to sue SWO and Lasana, but for now I will talk. I hired people who I can manipulate and control, people who will assure my position as president for the next 30+ years. Dennis was given a ultimatum, hire Stuart Charles or you not getting de wok and he agreed, you see, I didn't want Stuart to win because it woulda make me look bad, so ah hired him through Lawrence, this way when Lawrence fail, Stuart will slip right in,,,,this is why Dexter Skeene not here, because he voted for Stuart and I told him vote for Stuart and then resign so de public go feel I against him for voting for Stuart so it wouldn't look like I wanted Stuart, ah make him resign, but he coming back soon, like Terence Babwah did to Hart,,, Jamaal Shabaaz was de man with all these ideas and I like it, he knows how to do bad, where else in de world you could shoot down your government and country and then turn around and serve it for big money,,,, Shahdon Winchester will be captain for the next setta games, watch and see.

Sam: So Terence Babwah yuh make Stephen Hart get fired and now you get de pipe in yuh ass.
Terrance: Yeah boy Sam, you see, David John told me that for a doctor meh belly was to big and it was giving de TTFA a bad image because Shabaaz, DJW and Stuart Charles belly already big and he didn't want his staff looking like that especially de team doctor and I agree, he tell me lose some weight and he might take me back,,,, I feeling so bad I f000ck up Stephen Hart, now I have to go back Hart and beg for forgiveness. Sam, I went and see de team training, yuh know Stuart Charles coaching with a electric wheelchair?? he said he not sick, he just couldn't keep up with de players in training and this was de only way,,,, and guess what Sam, de man have a bucket of KFC chicken under he seat. I glad I left we, [[[ring]]] [[[ring]]] Hello,,,,, [hello, this is Contro from de SWO website],,,,,, how can I help you,,,,, [that is wrong what you did to Hart, is pay back now, it good for you, by de way, my belly big to, yuh have any remedy for me?],,,,,, f00ck you nah boy, allyuh on that website real f00ck up, is long time de TTFF was warning me about allyuh since Jack Warner days,,,,,, I going by San Fernando General Hospital and look for wok, call me in 5 days.

Sam: So Jamaal Shabaaz how you manage to control DJW, you seem like de only man could do that.
Jamaal: Three words Sam,,,,,, Yasin Abu Bakr..,,,,, DJW nearly shit heself when he hear that name,,,,, and when Rafanda retire from T&T football, he getting wok to, doh mind we on de no flight zone list,,, we could still have a good time, I plan on going to Tobago, is years now ah planning to go there, I dont need to fly no where else to have fun,,,,, I was de first coach to coach a team from a laptop and DJW was very impressed,,, he even buy de laptop from me, he say he plan to keep it for a couple years and put it on ebay to sell for big money,,,, I like my boss because he will sell he left nuts to make a buck and that is a true business man mentality.... de players eh get paid yet for de last setta games, but DJW assured them that they will get their money, but in installments, $50 dollars a month, he say Hart not getting his because he resign, he was not fired.

Sam: So Bertille ah hear you sick, how yuh doing yuh wok if you sick.
St Clair: Boy, that is only for name, they using my name as a scapegoat to win votes, I cah even feel meh prick,,,, fost meh hand weak,,,, but them want me on committee,,,,, you feel I really voted for a coach de odda day,,,,, I pick up de phone to call in and meh hand tremble and phone fall by de goat feet and when de person on de odda side asked if I voting for Fenwick, de goat bawl out ..."ehhhh,,, ehhhh".... and it counted,,,,, then next thing I hear Dennis get de wok,,,,, I nearly get sick twice, ,,, I wanted to vote for Yorke,,,,,,, Sam, between you and me, Latapy really can't get fired? [[yea boy,,, de man is a Stuart Charles reborn]].... way sah,,,, that man smoking more than a Ford Cortina and around de players and he coaching boy,,, I listen to him talk de odda day to de under 17 team, he does talk in slow motion, de players does forget what he say by de time he finish with one sentence,,, I see a man in de back yawning... Sam, I have to go, I expecting a call from Gally, he bringing some Viagra for meh, ah have ah goat to plannas, he f00ck up meh only vote,...

Sam: Stern John, de boss striker, how yuh feel bout yuh new wok.
Stern: Sam boy, I suppose just like you, I have a Academy (Football 7) for years now and never produce one player except for Tyrik (meh son) and I get de coaching wok, what can I say, Dennis is a real solider.

Sam: So Ross Russell, yuh back on de T&T coaching staff, how you manage that.
Ross: Sam, since my son get arrest for murder, my focus now is to give back, look how good I did with Ma Pau Stars, we came 4th in we first season, that is a big accomplishment, a took a bunch of super stars and made them play together, even though I never accomplish anything with T&T in de past as a coach, my experience was enough to get a coaching job, I was de best keeper T&T ever had, I was so good at keeping I will keep DJW secrets on de down low,,,, by de way Sam, de man say he want to bring in Earl Jean as de technical director, I feel them Lucien have a candle burning with he name on it,,,,, anyhow Sam, I have to go, is Karnival soon and I planning to go by Lara fete to keep a close eye on he gal.

Sam: Dexter Skeene, so you resign boy.
Dexter: Sam you believe that, steups, I am de pro league CEO for 12 years, we get 20 people in a game, we depend on government help and funds we get from clubs to partake and cah get fired, you feel I go let them fire me,,, de clubs paying us $400,000 to operate in de league and all we doing is managing their own money,,, then we promise them a prize and they never get it but still playing in de league, how chupid people really is, look Central FC waiting for money 4 years now and is 3 years they around,,,, when Sancho was MoS he use to squeeze we balls to,,, now is pay back.... DJW need de league cooperation, besides, we working together to stop Keith Look Loy from forming de TTSL, because Keith want to outshine me, nah, that regulation thing could affect W Connection, if they get regulated they will lost a lot of money and I want to keep my option open with de TTFA because yuh never know, I may go back soon..

Sam: So Carolina how yuh like de wok so far.
Carolina Morace: I am happy, because this is the only country in the world where women get paid more than men to perform de same job. I am also happy that I was allow to bring in my own staff, look a the men's coach, his staff was not his picking from what I understand and I also understand his team was already picked,,,,,. They want me to train the women players, but we need games, T&T is like vacation, I get $50,000 US a month plus car and place to live.

« Last Edit: February 14, 2017, 04:00:34 PM by Sam »
Faster than a speeding pittbull
Stronger than a shot of ba-bash
Capable of storming any fete


Offline ON DE BLOCK

  • Sr. Warrior
  • ****
  • Posts: 387
    • View Profile
Re: Lawrence, DJW, Skeene and de crew open up interviews.
« Reply #1 on: February 14, 2017, 11:35:54 AM »
money ho's & clothes is all djwttfa knows..

Offline benedicts bwoy

  • Sr. Warrior
  • ****
  • Posts: 299
    • View Profile
Re: Lawrence, DJW, Skeene and de crew open up interviews.
« Reply #2 on: February 14, 2017, 01:13:11 PM »
Well yes  ;D ;D Sam yuh rel good!!

Bertille say he have ah goat to planass, he f*ckup he only vote!!! CLASSIC!!!! :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

Offline Controversial

  • Hero Warrior
  • *****
  • Posts: 6765
    • View Profile
    • Gino McKoy
Re: Lawrence, DJW, Skeene and de crew open up interviews.
« Reply #3 on: February 14, 2017, 01:20:02 PM »
Take win brother  :D

Offline Errol

  • Hero Warrior
  • *****
  • Posts: 709
    • View Profile
Re: Lawrence, DJW, Skeene and de crew open up interviews.
« Reply #4 on: February 14, 2017, 03:56:37 PM »
Lard !!!!!!

 :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

Bertille take win.

Sam, at his best.

I will read again when I get home, my belly hurting meh.


Offline kounty

  • Hero Warrior
  • *****
  • Posts: 3006
  • Truthfulness is brighter than the light of the sun
    • View Profile
Re: Lawrence, DJW, Skeene and de crew open up interviews.
« Reply #5 on: February 14, 2017, 08:25:04 PM »
I ent read a Line yet, but I read the title...ent really pay attention to who post it. But from the Time ah open & see is Sam ah say yes! Daiz why I find it was so strange ;) great timing!

Offline soccerman

  • Hero Warrior
  • *****
  • Posts: 4613
    • View Profile
Re: Lawrence, DJW, Skeene and de crew open up interviews.
« Reply #6 on: February 15, 2017, 09:16:31 AM »
 :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: Hilarious!

Offline Sam

  • Hero Warrior
  • *****
  • Posts: 8229
  • Police face and dog heart.
    • View Profile
Re: Lawrence, DJW, Skeene and de crew open up interviews.
« Reply #7 on: February 15, 2017, 04:16:33 PM »
Even though is ah joke ting, ah have a good feeling about Stern John as coach, he have a real good attitude.

Stuart eh bad either, but Ross Russell does crawl meh blood.

Faster than a speeding pittbull
Stronger than a shot of ba-bash
Capable of storming any fete


Offline asylumseeker

  • Moderator
  • Hero Warrior
  • *****
  • Posts: 17297
    • View Profile
Re: Lawrence, DJW, Skeene and de crew open up interviews.
« Reply #8 on: February 15, 2017, 05:20:22 PM »
Even though is ah joke ting, ah have a good feeling about Stern John as coach, he have a real good attitude.

Stuart eh bad either, but Ross Russell does crawl meh blood.

Stern is said to be a perfectionist.

Offline Sando

  • Hero Warrior
  • *****
  • Posts: 2992
    • View Profile
Re: Lawrence, DJW, Skeene and de crew open up interviews.
« Reply #9 on: February 16, 2017, 05:44:39 AM »
Lawrence, DJW, Skeene and de crew open up interviews.
By Samuel Edwards [swo editor at large].


Sam: So Terence Babwah yuh make Stephen Hart get fired and now you get de pipe in yuh ass.
Terrance: Yeah boy Sam, you see, David John told me that for a doctor meh belly was to big and it was giving de TTFA a bad image because Shabaaz, DJW and Stuart Charles belly already big and he didn't want his staff looking like that especially de team doctor and I agree, he tell me lose some weight and he might take me back,,,, I feeling so bad I f000ck up Stephen Hart, now I have to go back Hart and beg for forgiveness. Sam, I went and see de team training, yuh know Stuart Charles coaching with a electric wheelchair?? he said he not sick, he just couldn't keep up with de players in training and this was de only way,,,, and guess what Sam, de man have a bucket of KFC chicken under he seat. I glad I left we, [[[ring]]] [[[ring]]] Hello,,,,, [hello, this is Contro from de SWO website],,,,,, how can I help you,,,,, [that is wrong what you did to Hart, is pay back now, it good for you, by de way, my belly big to, yuh have any remedy for me?],,,,,, f00ck you nah boy, allyuh on that website real f00ck up, is long time de TTFF was warning me about allyuh since Jack Warner days,,,,,, I going by San Fernando General Hospital and look for wok, call me in 5 days.

 :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

Boy Sam, you not easy boss.


Offline Star Child

  • Hero Warrior
  • *****
  • Posts: 710
  • Pure Pipe
    • View Profile
Re: Lawrence, DJW, Skeene and de crew open up interviews.
« Reply #10 on: February 16, 2017, 08:41:47 AM »
Amazing kicks,  :rotfl:


Offline Pastor Stuart

  • New Warrior
  • *
  • Posts: 37
    • View Profile
Re: Lawrence, DJW, Skeene and de crew open up interviews.
« Reply #11 on: February 17, 2017, 07:11:48 AM »
Been reading the forum as a guest, but just had to come out of hiding for this one. This is some mad funny stuff.  :rotfl:

Is some of these stuff actually real?

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness - 1 John 1:9.

For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evils. It is through this craving that some have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many pangs - 1 Timothy 6:10

« Last Edit: February 17, 2017, 07:15:34 AM by Pastor Stuart »

Offline Observer

  • Hero Warrior
  • *****
  • Posts: 5428
  • The best gift for a footballer is Intelligence ---
    • View Profile
Re: Lawrence, DJW, Skeene and de crew open up interviews.
« Reply #12 on: February 28, 2017, 05:42:46 PM »
Sorry I took so long to read this. Yuh killing me yes :rotfl: You should get in to some
satire writing. Politics, Social Commentary and Sport. You could make some coin we.

I doing okay ketching my ass with a smile.
To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead
                                              Thomas Paine

Offline Controversial

  • Hero Warrior
  • *****
  • Posts: 6765
    • View Profile
    • Gino McKoy
Re: Lawrence, DJW, Skeene and de crew open up interviews.
« Reply #13 on: February 28, 2017, 07:10:58 PM »
Sorry I took so long to read this. Yuh killing me yes :rotfl: You should get in to some
satire writing. Politics, Social Commentary and Sport. You could make some coin we.

I doing okay ketching my ass with a smile.

You will always have our support my brother .... :beermug:

Offline Jack Horner

  • Sr. Warrior
  • ****
  • Posts: 442
    • View Profile
Re: Lawrence, DJW, Skeene and de crew open up interviews.
« Reply #14 on: March 01, 2017, 03:49:04 AM »
Very amusing stuff, but let me asked you this Mr Sam, why don't you guys give Jack Warner name a break in you all stupidness?

No other has accomplished or done more for T&T and Caribbean football than Jack Warner.

We wouldn't even have a professional league if it was not for him, look what Skeene is doing to the league now, when Jack was there it was well managed and sponsors were there.

David John Williams relationship to Jamaal Shabaaz, Stuart Charles and W Connection will always have priority over T&T football.

Look at John Williams, he is part of the board for the proposed Caribbean Premier League, its been 3 years and he can't get it off the ground because its not benefiting to him. Same can be said about Shaka Hislop.

David John Williams will not hire anyone he cannot control.

Jack Warner was always there taking care of business first hand.

You guys have to give credit where credit is due.

« Last Edit: March 01, 2017, 05:05:03 AM by Jack Horner »
Jack Warner will rise again and the world will beg him him to return and he will say "NO".............